Medical mumble jumble. . .

The Endocrinology class went 'blank'.

"That's why I always said, we shouldn't be having Stethoscope as our symbol; rather a Ryle's tube would suit better."

The class still; blank.

- Dr. Murlidhar Verma; on spoon feeding college education.

p.s.  Ryle's tube (rylz) n. a thin flexible tube of rubber or plastic, which is inserted into the stomach through the mouth or nose of a patient and is used for withdrawing fluid from the stomach or for giving a test meal. [ J. A. Ryle (1889–1950), British physician]

Door creaks to open into the dark room.

Dr. Krishna Rao: Soo, why are you late by 22 minutes. What's your excuse?
No response.
Dr. KR: At least tell me the last night's foot ball match's score!
...[No response. Out of coverage area.]
P S: Chile!
KR: Chh. . .i. . .leee??
R T: No, BraziL!
K R: Br. . a. . .zilll??? Why are you even here!

 

Okay, I repeat. What's your take on the 'paper thin' walls in the Ophthalmology dept.? ;p

 

 

Never did the World 'blur' more than it did today.

All courtesy to the Tropicamide at the Ophthal OPD which got my eyes wiiide open. . .!

 

An 'Ayoo' in the Ophthal Septic OT. . .

We enter into the 'SEPTIC' Theatre terribly awaiting renovation, obviously! It looks like a kitchen filled Operation theatre stuff; damn it!


Patient undergoing {multiple Chalazion incision and curettage}; moaning, groaning, with clenched fists!

Dr. Lavanya Rao: You have to wait. If you don't cooperate, I can't finish and you'll have to come again and again.

Patient: (Howls and kicks in the air) Ha ha ha! That's true but (shouts in pain again) shhh. . . .ah ahhh, it's terrible madam, unbearable! Ayooo! Why don't you give an injection or something[ raising his hand to his eye and gesturing a poke in poke out.]

Dr. L R: I already gave two.

Patient: [Again, in his normal tone] Ooh! You already removed the big one!

Technician[ to students]- It's over. Change your scrubs. You can't go back to the OT directly from the Septic theater.


p.s.-"Septic" OT; so much for the name!

 

". . . . . .is the percentage.
It is not my figure. It is Davidson's.
. . . . . .is the approximate number.
It is not my figure. It is Davidson's."

...

-An extract from today's Medicine class on Headache!

"The most important thing about Skin is that it is very important."
-The introductory class on Skin appendages.
 

"God, somehow, is an arranged person. . . ."

"DON'T bundle anybody up, IMMOBILIZE!"

- Dr. Arjun Chacko @ the Saturday Neuro- Surgery Class!

p.s Sagnik Surya said; one of the best neuro-surgery classes eva ....." durin bath ...the last amt of water in a bucket which ppl cant leave behind..." haha..damn...

 

 

‎"Statistics are like Bikinis; they never reveal the most important things!"

-Dr. Varma on the deceivable nature of neutrophil to lymphocyte ratio. . .

p.s. On public demand! Well, you were expecting it, weren't you! ;)

 

A minute of Dr. K P Sir's ENT class!

Note:
'[x]'- indicate the gaps and pure spaces between spoken words.

. . .[2sec] Cystic fibrosis. [8sec later]. .can be allergy also.[10sec]. .some of them can be Auto-immune conditions.[8sec]. .can be associated with other syndromes. . .blah. . .blah[]. . .blah. [ 13 sec later]. . .I aleady mentioned about Cystic Fibrosis! [10 sec]. . . . . . .

p.s. Well, you can see the stats yourself ;p
 

"Sure. This is the last slide.
I'm jus' going in the reverse order."

- Dr. Sudhir Nayak@ Fungal infections class.

 

‎"I want to 'hear' him 'think'."

-Dr. Suresh Pillai; as Varun Gynaeshwar was shakin' to make them. . . ;p

 

"It's got Menthol. It goes to places you have never known to exist. It doesn't open up your nose. You just feel it does."

-Dr. Suresh Pillai on Vicks inhaler.

 

'When you are deprived of your normal supply of microbes, the immune systems get a poor education.'

 

 "There are 3 kinds of lies-

Lies,

Damned lies and 

Statistics

-Dr. Asha Kamath @ intro Bio Statistics class

p.s- from the back benches; " Head lice, body lice. . ."

"Doctors, learn to err on the safer side. Anything you do not know, blame it on the genes."

-Akaash vaani; the voice from the skies ;p

 

The reality of life-

"Diseases do not read text books. Only we do."

"Thumba heat aagida body alli"; the patient will say.  The side effect of drug combination.

-Dr. Mularidhar Verma

"What makes me more wise than that guy begging on the street? Is it me knowing, that an Amoeba exists!!

-Raviteja. :)